Coffee Cures Cancer

Life is mysterious; it is full of grandeur and commonality and it is full of complexity. Life is full, indeed, like a fat man at an all-you-can-eat buffet, life is full. It is full of countless nouns, verbs and adjectives. Shall I name some? Nah. It'd be easier to get to the point.

Life needs only be as complicated as you make it. The key word there was need. It seems that all of our lives get the better of us, from time to time, but I've casually observed, what I think is, a common thread in us all. Subconsciously, we all need a certain level of drama in our lives. No matter how loud our self-proclamation of living a drama-free life is, we all swim in it. Well, some wade, some swim and others drown.

Drama is conflict and conflict is complexity and complexity breeds comfort...until the level of complexity hits a saturation point at which time it breeds a complete lack of control. There you have it. That is when your life starts living you. That is also when you become a reactionary role player in your own life. We've all heard the expression "watching life pass you by"; well, this is the origin. In my estimation, this is a completely controllable situation. It is also one that, left unattended, will spin out of control faster than an impulse-shopper's checkbook.

Lately, I've noticed a recurring theme in the lives of those around me. I don't think this is aything new, but I think that it's just something that I've picked up on. For the most part, everyone says they don't want drama. Yet, some people would be floored if they could actually see how drama they bring upon themselves and those surrounding them. It has led me to conclude that drama is not avoidable, but the level of drama is. However, the common theme that I've picked-up on is that people don't recognize their personal level of required drama.

Here's a clue. If you are someone that consistently find yourself in drama packed situations then you might consider this: you are the problem. I'm not sayin'...I'm just sayin'...it just might....might....might be possible that it is not everyone you're surrounded by. The answer to your life full of drama may be only as far away as the nearest mirror.

Have you ever heard of a common denominator? Have you ever looked at two seemingly unrelated events and connected them through something that they both shared? (This is slightly out there, but talking to a friend about a guy we both know, that was something of a blast from the past, reminded me of this tasteless scenario.) If two guys get the clap and they both slept with the same girl, they just might have a common denominator. Of course, they could also search for an unrelated explanation and drive themselves completely nuts when the answer was as plain as the presciption bottle on the sink.

Denial is a poweful tool. People don't want to believe certain things. Another gigantic factor in this psycho-carousel of drama is the fact that people can't recognize their own role in their life. Hard to believe isn't it? It's out there, I'll grant you that. But, I believe people don't recognize their own significance in their own lives. Part of my realization that led this writing, was reading that the most important relationship you have in life is the one you have with yourself, on - of all things - someone's MySpace profile. Seems sublime, huh? Seems insignificant, you think? I did too. But, then a group of unrelated thoughts all started to meld as one large body of work. The atomic composition of a theory, if you will.

So, as to not get too sidetracked, which I often do, I think it all comes down to something simple. Being happy with yourself is far too complex to solve here and now. But, taking a step toward sanity and comfort is simple.

Arbitrary things often take the role of the real action. Sometimes it really is as easy as the Matt Damon line in Good Will Hiunting when his character was asked to coffee by Skylar (as played by Minnie Driver). He responded that perhaps they could go get some chocolates. Confusing her, he explained that sharing coffee was an arbitrary action and activity that was, really, just a way for them to spend time together. So, like the boyfriend who bitches about shopping with his girlfriend, maybe it's not the shopping that matters. Perhaps shopping is the activity though which the "quality time" is achieved. (Whether or not you truly want to spend time with the other person just might be the real issue there.)

Have you been to a coffee house lately? (Shit, I don't even know where there's a good one in Manhattan.) The one thing that I see in them, that I think others may miss, is that the coffee is secondary. People are there enjoying each others company. They are doing something they enjoy; they are reading, they are gaming or they are watching a movie. They aren't lined up like critics judging coffee. The coffee is arbitrary. Well, unless I don't know what arbitrary means... But, I digress. Coffee could be the answer; the cure for what ails you; the missing link; the cure for social cancer.

So, in a world where people verbalize a longing for less drama, I merely offer a conscious choice to reduce the complexity in your life. Unlike aspirin, leave two and call me in the morning. Don't take anything. Leave things. A reduction in voluntarily carried-on items leads to a flight with less baggage, as we can't do anything about our checked baggage. Just carry a little less on the flight and we might all be happier for it.

It makes me think of coffee shops. People in coffee shops may be quiet or keep to themselves, but they seem content. I think there's something to it that we can all take away. Maybe we could all just grab a triple-no-fat, super skim, vanilla almond, triple blend, half-caff latte and lighten the hell up.